Today we celebrated Brenham’s 3rd birthday in Heaven.
I’ve thought about him all day today.
I’ve had reminders of him everywhere.
When I took a wrong turn on the road today I turned around in a funeral home driveway. It reminded me of when we went to the funeral home to plan Brenham’s memorial service and burial. I remember talking to the funeral director and picking out flowers. I thought about when we walked into another room and saw the itty bitty caskets displayed for us to choose between. I remember thinking how unfair it was to be picking out his final resting place on a day we had planned to register for baby gifts and pick out bouncy seats and pack and plays, places for him to rest, temporarily.
When we went to buy balloons to release at the cemetery tonight I saw a little plaque that said “Those we hold in our arms for a little while we hold in our hearts forever” and I was reminded of those precious moments we spent holding Brenham in the hospital room knowing he was gone but needing something for my empty arms to hold on to.
I met a hearse on the road on our way home from town and I was reminded of his burial service. We rode from the church to the cemetery in the back of the funeral director’s car with Brenham’s little casket sitting in the middle of us. Robb and I each placed a shovel full of dirt in the hole after his casket was lowered into the ground. I can still hear the sound it made as the dirt hit the casket. It was the middle of Winter but I don’t remember feeling cold, in fact I didn’t feel anything. Totally numb.
I had to call my OB’s office today to inquire about switching birth control pills and I was reminded of when I dialed that same phone number with hands shaking from pain in my boss’ office at work 3 years ago today. I was in the worst pain of my life and the contractions were so strong I could barely breathe let alone talk. I remember my doctor telling me to come right up to labor and delivery and that’s when I knew things were bad.
Today we celebrate those reminders of him and thank God for the promise of eternal life with Him in Heaven, where we’ll all be together again some day!
Happy Birthday Baby.
I’ll see you on the other side

~yesterday it was pajama day at a play group we go to and i let grayden wear his Mickey Mouse pjs because he loves Mickey so much and i love him so much! I was NEVER going to be that mom that dresses their child in character clad clothes…just not my style (especially in public)…my how things change!!

~i woke up to a big thud this morning, grayden climbed {not so gracefully} out of his crib and landed with a BANG! My heart skipped a beat and I jumped out of bed and ran to his room to find him laying on the floor, so scary! there were a few tears (from both of us) but within seconds Gray was asking for crackers already! While he had breakfast I spent some time online looking for big boy bedding!

~Robb made a new years resolution to read more this year and I've kind of adapted it for my own. 3 books down already (I normally only read on vacation so 3 books by February is huge for me!) I HIGHLY recommend “The Hole in Our Gospel” and “Same Kind of Different as Me” read that one in 3 days (another large accomplishment for me!)

~the other day I discovered just where to plug our vacuum into the wall so that I can vacuum the whole main floor with out moving it! Bonus! I’ll definitely miss that when we move some day.

~ I bought milk last week that expires on 2/29…there is no 2/29 this year…i know.

~speaking of Brenham’s birth date lately I keep having dreams (3 to be exact and they are more like nightmares) that I’m in a  hospital in pre-term labor again ( for the record I’m not pregnant in real life, in case anyone was dream-interpreting). I can only ever remember having 1 dream specifically with Brenham in it. And it was a long time ago. I wish I would have more of those and less of the other. They are horrible.

~Gray can now count to 20 and spell his name!

~I’m super looking forward to Spring, I can’t wait to be able to play outside…we are bored in here!

~We’ve been so fortunate that Grayden has stayed so healthy this Winter, it seems like there is so much going around these days and he hasn’t been sick at all! So thankful for a healthy babe!

That's all for today!

i love you like crazy gray-baby!

We took Grayden bowling for the first time a couple weekends ago as a part of our annual Church Bowling Night.

We had a lot of fun but I think we might wait another year or before we take him again :)

Love,

Grayden

how's that for random!

My sweet baby niece:

Makenna Sue

February 8, 2011

8:02 pm

8lbs 5oz. 20 inches

Congrats Kyle and Mindy

She is such a doll!

{first time auntie!}

{first time uncle}

{kisses for baby cousin!}

I'm so excited to be an auntie, let the fun begin!

We had so much snow dumped on us last week!

Pictures don’t even do justice to how much snow there was!

Grayden loved playing outside…

the snow was fun for a day or so, i actually enjoyed being forced to stay home and cuddle up in the warm house but now I’m ready for Spring!!

Grayden received sessions to Kindermusik as a Christmas gift from G & G L. He had his first class on Monday. Robb had the day off work so we could all go together, Grayden loved it, just like we know he would!

Grayden’s love for music and his killer dance moves are something he definitely inherited from his birth parents. They both love music and are very talented in that department, we think its really special to see that develop in him and can’t wait to see where his love for music takes him!

The other day he took a toy hammer to his mouth and said “i sing, i sing”! So cute.