{this and that}

Sunday, December 29, 2013

This post will probably be long and quite boring for most of you, but I wanted to record some random things I want to remember about recovery, postpartum time and Jovie's first 2 weeks.
Also here's your TMI warning :)

My body was more than ready for Jovie to come, but she just wasn't, she was still nice and cozy in there and I ended up with a csection 4 hours after I began pushing! (I'll post the entire birth story soon). To be honest, I was pretty disappointed about it and sometimes still am. I'm so thankful that she's here and healthy, but I can't help be sad at times that we didn't get to experience the delivery we were hoping for. I never got to have the baby put right on my chest or watch Robb cut the cord like we so wanted. I know God had a reason for things to go the way they went and we trust that plan to be best. Her heart rate was dropping during contractions and I'm just so thankful there's an alternative way to delivery.

I had a rough recovery with all kinds of crazy things happen those first few days in the hospital.
~I had to have Magnesium through my IV for the first 24 hours (i think) after delivery to lower my blood pressure. That stuff made me kinda loopy and sadly it makes my memories of that time a little fuzzy.
~I had an allergic reaction to the Mag and it made my legs itch like crazy, I wanted to rip my skin off! I had Robb try to scratch them as hard as he could but it just wasn't cutting it, so he got my hair brush out of my bag and used that to scratch them until the benadryl kicked in! Genius, just too bad we didn't have two!
~Friday night was rough, I was exhausted but didn't sleep well between the vital checks, lab work, the nurses coming to give pain meds and push on your belly (owie!) it was a long night.
~When I had the urge to pee the next morning I got up and sat on the toilet for 10 minutes and just couldn't pee, I had to pee but nothing was happening. It was the weirdest feeling. Then, when I gave up and got up off the toilet I passed out on the bathroom floor! All the nurses came in to help me up and they even busted out the smelling salts!  Some time passed and by then I was about to burst I had to pee so bad it was painful. I was so bloated it felt like i was gonna split open my incision. Again, I tried and tried and had no luck, Robb ran the bathroom water and my nurse gave me lavender oil to smell in hopes that it would help me relax and pee. I ended up needing the catheter put back in to relieve the pressure! Out came 900 ccs! I knew I had to go! I'm still not sure exactly what caused that, I heard it could have been due to how swollen I was down there after pushing for 3.5 hours with all my might, or it could have been a long lasting effect from the epidural.
~By Saturday night night I had the peeing thing figured out again, but started having horrible pain in my neck, I first thought it was a bad kink from looking down at the baby all the time but the pain started to move down to my ribs and it was excruciating. Turns out that was trapped gas pain from the surgery. Who knew that could cause so much pain?! I hardly slept at all that night either!
Sunday was a much better day. I was able to walk around more without hunching over, the gas pain was there but tolerable and I had some time to catch up on sleep between visitors.
~Monday I had my staples taken out and finally was able to go home!
~My legs were super weak, and still aren't back to normal even 2+weeks later. I must have lost a ton of muscle tone while on bed rest and totally exhausted my myself with all that pushing. It felt like I ran a marathon after spending 2 weeks on the couch. They are getting better but stairs are hard and I have to use my arms to lift my legs and cross them. Walking is fine but if it requires lifting my leg or getting up off the floor without something to hold onto and use my arms to lift me up I'm in trouble! So strange!
~I felt like I was hit by a bus and had two babies, one vaginally and one by csection. I had an ice pack on my belly and an ice pack on my crotch...I was a hot mess!
~I was feeling like a new women after the first 6-7 days and was off the pain meds completely.
~It was hard to spend those days resting and recovering when all I wanted to do was take care of my kids again. It had been 2 weeks since I did any care for the boys due to the bed rest and I missed them so much. It was hard to not compare my mothering ability to when we took the boys home from the hospital and I had no recovery whatsoever and could do anything and everything to care for them. I couldn't do anything without help from Robb and that's so difficult for me.

And after all that, I would still do it all over again in a heartbeat. Our little miracle was worth every ounce of pain, discomfort, exhaustion and embarrassment of my recovery.


First of all, I already miss being pregnant! I knew I would, we obviously are thrilled to have Jovie here so we can love on her and share her, but there is something totally special about being pregnant and growing a little miracle inside you.

I can't even tell the number of times I have a moment of panic when I realize I haven't felt the baby kick in awhile! It's an awful feeling that thankfully only lasts a half second when I realize that's because I'm not pregnant anymore! Ha!

Those first few days after her birth I had a major big appetite and was way hungrier then than I ever was during pregnancy!

I am not nursing due to the medication I take and I have no problem with that. We formula fed the boys as well, obviously, and they are healthy and happy boys!

I do get nervous though whenever I have to mix a bottle up in public. I'm afraid someone will come over and tell me I'm feeding my baby poison or something from those 'passionate people!' With the boys I always had a good excuse and now with Jovie I still do, I need to take those meds to stay healthy and she needs me to be as healthy as possible, but some might not see it that way.

My creatnine the day of delivery (Friday) was up to 2.45, and by Monday it was down to 1.8. My baseline before pregnancy was 1.3. My hemoglobin was 9.5 on Friday and 7 on Monday. I had it checked again this past Monday and it was back at 9.5! I'm continuing the injections to try to boost it a bit more but hopefully will only need a few more. I'll continue to have frequent lab work to get my medication levels back in tune as well as check on kidney function.

My milk came in and dried up within a day or two, much quicker than after Brenham's birth, my milk lasted for weeks after his birth.

We are just so in love with her and are so unworthy of this life God has given us and its given me a little case of anxiety. Anxiety over something bad happening because she seems to good to be true.  I had that after we took the boys home too. I'm constantly working on it, praying about it, and reminding myself that God doesn't want us to worry but just be thankful and give our anxieties to Him. (Phil 4:6)

Somehow I only have 3 pounds left to lose until I'm back at my pre-pregnancy weight. That being said, I'll still have some work to do to get back in shape. Like I mentioned earlier, I have no muscle tone and things are a lot softer than they used to be!

Postpartum hormones are real! I don't consider myself to be a highly emotional or sensitive person normally, but lately oh my word that's so not the case! I've cried over the silliest things but most of my tears come from pure happiness and thankfulness for this sweet little girl.

I've been able to get at least a 20 minute nap in everyday so far. It's not much but sometimes it's just what I need for a little burst of energy to get through the day.

We're still getting used to having a girl! She gets called "buddy" and "he" quite a bit yet and shopping in the pink section still feels a little odd! We are just loving it though!

We have no idea who she looks like. That's actually something we kind of forgot about, this baby could look like us! It was just never something that was important to us, for our kids to share our DNA never mattered so now that we do have a biological child we don't even think about that part! I think most people say she looks like me, but I really don't know!

She's starting to like her paci more and more. At the hospital she never had a paci, definitely something new to us, the boys had one from the get go.

She makes the sweetest little noises, very girly compared to the boys as newborns!

She's just now finding her voice and starting to cry, before now it was just whimpers and whines.

She lost her umbilical stump on Christmas Day.

Jovie eats really well, burps good and doesn't spit up. We just bumped her up to 3oz during the nighttime feedings.

Her skin is peeling like crazy, that's something else we never experienced with the boys, I heard it has to do with her being early.

We were both expecting her to have more hair! We had 2 different ultrasound techs point out her hair during an ultrasound so I had pictured the baby to have a whole head of hair. She really just has some peach fuzz!

She always has her hands by her face and her fingers spread wide, both are things we noticed during multiple ultrasounds. Its so cool to know that all those sneak peaks we had of the baby on the ultrasounds were HER in there! I was looking at the very first ultrasound picture of her and saw she was 1.75cm long at 8 weeks gestation, and 29 weeks later she grew to be 18.5 inches. Such a miracle babies are.

I mentioned before that she gets startled really easily by noises, but one noise that doesn't startle her is the dog barking. She must have gotten quite used to that noise while in my belly because I distinctly remember both boys just screaming whenever the dog would bark those first few weeks we had them home.

She's gaining more and more head and neck strength and starting to be more alert while she's awake and looking around! She's growing!

She is such a good baby so far. God must have known that we needed that during this busy time in our lives. They boys are doing great too, they seem to have adjusted amazingly well to having her around! (More on them later!)

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15 Responses to “ {this and that} ”

Claudia said...

You forgot one thing. You forgot how brave you have been as you brought your daughter into this world! So much of this, although joyful, must have been difficult for you along the way. I enjoy reading your posts and seeing your family grow! My own much longed for son is about to turn 18! Lots of the pictures of your boys and their hi jinx bring back such fond memories! So thank you for writing and sharing! Only the best for you!

Jami said...

Thank you for sharing. I had two C-sections, the first after 12 hours of labor, luckily it never got to pushing and the second was scheduled. So thankful I didn't have to recover in two places. I can't imagine.

I formula fed both my boys. No excuses here, it was a personal choice on my part. I tried nursing and failed miserably at it. I am terrible at asking for help, I feel like I need to do it all, therefore I never asked for support. I still have my regrets on that. But I totally understand how you feel about making a bottle in public. I always felt like I had daggers being thrown at me.

Thank you again for sharing, she is just as beautiful as can be.
God Bless you and your family.

Melody said...

First of all, I wouldn't worry about mixing a bottle in public. It's your business, not anyone else's and you are doing what works for you and Jovie. Second, you have to realize that you just came through a major surgery. Your body is adjusting, and you are doing quite well. You will get your tone back, don't worry :)

Ashley B. said...

Two c-sections here. First after pushing for over 2hrs, the second was a failed vbac (stalling at 5cm). My first c-section recovery was not favorable. My midwife said it was likely from working so hard on the planned vaginal delivery and then going through major surgery. I had random shooting pains for the a good two weeks when changing positions; I was exhausted. My second c-section recovery was much better. Hormones were a little more crazy with my second. We purposely asked for very few visitors at the hospital which I loved. It was very quiet. Then we came home to a small house of 9 people. I was overwhelmed and just started crying because it was so noisy.

Give yourself time to recover and don't over do it. My OB was very to the point about taking it easy after my second c-section. It was easier to follow the rules when I just had one baby to care for. Adding a second was hectic; a newborn and a just turned 2 year old, older brother. I'm sure some people thought I was lazy because I didn't care full loads of laundry, vacuum, etc until I got the okay from my OB but I was not about to risk any internal stitch rips, etc.

Enjoy your beautiful family!!!

Rebecca Siewert said...

I had a preemie first and had to bottle feed. I never had any comments about the bottle. If someone says something accidentally spill it on them!

I'm sorry you ended up with a c-section... I was really sad after my daughter was born 8 weeks early. I kept thinking about the things I was missing out on, and the nicu staff was getting to do. I think no matter how your baby is brought into this world there will be something you feel like you missed out on.

Traci said...

Congrats again! I remember not being able to go to the bathroom after my first. It didn't last too long but it was very weird and painful and then when I could go it came out so slow! With my second I asked them to leave the catheter in longer and I didn't have any problems then. For me I think it was the epidural.

DianeTaylor said...

Hi Katie - I totally agree with Claudia - after what you and Robb have been thru, this had to be an anxious time for you :):):) I am SO GLAD she is here!

I remember how hard it was to recover after Jonathan arrived (I had 4 misscarriages before I had him so he was always my miracle boy to me) - but once he was in my arms....all that pain melted away, and all I felt was pure love and immense joy in my heart. I still feel that joy 25 years later, even though he is gone to heaven. It is such a priviledge to be his mom, and know that I gave him life. Now he has a beautiful life with Jesus.

I hope you continue to heal, and I know you will be working out and back to your old self soon. Love all the photos of Christmas and all the best in 2014 :):

xo - Diane

Debbie said...

Congratulations! I breastfed all three of my children, but did turn to formula when needed. People should mind their own business. Even though I nursed, I do not feel like that is the best choice for everyone. It worked for me. When it stopped working (after two infections and a threatened surgical draining of my breast), I switched to formula for about a month until my son turned one. Do what is best for your family. Take care of your self and accept help. Before you know it, this precious time will be over!

Beth said...

You are so very worthy of God's gift of Jovie!!!! I loved the part of the ice on the stomach and crotch - I can relate to the later!!!

So glad things are getting better for you and that Jovie is doing so wonderfully!!

Continued prayers for you all!

bella said...

Jovie is such a beautiful baby! I can relate to how you felt disappointed by not having an ideal birth experience. My first daughter was adopted and my second daughter was born in just 6 hours, no medication,and only pushed twice to get her out. With my third daughter she had a compound presentation with her hand coming in front of her head.During labor her heart rate decreased and she was in distress. They had to do an emergency c section and I couldn't even be awake for the birth. Luckily she was born in perfect health. I remembered feeling let down and angry at first but totally in love with my baby. As time went on I realized how blessed we were to have had a c section. My youngest daughter is now 30 and extremely intelligent and successful. My doctor told me, "The only c section you regret is the one you did not do."

Tena said...

I breastfed both of my kids but I do recognize that there are times when women can't. My only advice in case someone rude says something would be to say you are doing what is best for your family, and you are on medication which would make your milk unsafe for your baby. Nothing wrong with calling your daughter buddy, either (I do to mine, at least). The shock of having a girl after a boy/boys will eventually wear off. I think it took close to two years for me though! Congratulations again on your healthy baby girl!

Anonymous said...

I have had two c sections. I breast fed both of my boys until they were well over a year old and they caught every germ imaginable and still seem to (in elementary school). So don't feel guilty, my oldest was a baby during the height of the "Baby Einstein" dvd stage. He receives remedial help in school--they said the babies would be geniuses! You can have very healthy kiddos with formula. I too remember the horrible pain in my neck and down my shoulder from gas. The worst/most embarrassing was when the doctor would tell me to "let it rip!" and encouraged me "toot!" Literally EVERY time I mustered up the courage to "let it rip", someone would come in to visit in the hospital. I remember just praying for people to leave so I could toot! Thanks for bringing back the interesting memories! Enjoy your little girl.

Anonymous said...

I can totally relate to having 2 ice packs! Funny when you really think about it. Baby#1 didn't want to leave her cozy warm home either resulting in a c-section. For #2 we opted for a repeat. I remember those gas pains, like contractions in your shoulder! Oh the not so lovely side of mothering, but totally worth the lack of privacy and having people all over your business. Modesty? What is that? I was able to breastfeed both babes, but not everyone is able and there is NOTHING wrong with that! Think of it this way...daddy can feed her at night too! My husband always slept right through, lucky dog. Congrats to you and your family!

Anonymous said...

Im sorry you feel the "mommy shame". Its very very sad that women can be so judgmental and mean to each other, especially when we need each other the most. Breast is best- except when it isnt. I am sorry you have to feel even an ounce of shame about feeding your baby in public. You are doing a great job, keep it up!!

Anonymous said...

So glad she is healthy and you will lose the 3 pounds quick..give yourself time to heal and accept help when it is offered (I know it is hard for me to do so). I had a planned C-section due to medical complications so I cannot even imagine how hard it was for you to push and then have to switch to a C-section. It is hard to not have things go the way you wanted but in the long run what is important is that she is healthy and you are too. I am happy for you. As far as itching, it may not have been the mag it could have been the pain meds (Vicodin can cause some people to itch like crazy - I know it did for me). Nothing wrong with bottle feeding - I had to do so due to not producing enough milk - 1 ounce after over 2 hours of pumping which was recommended to get the milk flowing along with taking pill that did not work is not going to feed a baby (TMI I know) but not everyone can breastfeed so don't let people give you guilt over bottle feeding. Hang in there!