Sunday, August 24, 2008

I don't remember

I miss brenham so much lately, its seems like forever ago that i held him last. As a way to remember him i often ask robb to tell me about brenham and the story of his birth, what he remembers about it. I have been doing this since day one but lately the story has become shorter and shorter and the treasured details have escaped us. I wanted to remember every detail of him, every minute of his arrival, but i don't. And that makes me miss him so much more. Why cant i recall those precious moments? They were all i had, and i want them back.

10 comments:

whirlygig said...

It's pretty well documented in the beginning of your blog.

Sandy E said...

I know exactly what you mean, Katie. It doesn't help much to know your feelings are completely normal, but they are. It's natural for it to fade, and it's natural for you to not want it to. (I don't know if I like those words "normal" and "natural"... but you know what I mean. It's all ok.) Write down your memories; capture them however you can. Talk about Brenham as much as you need to. He is a part of you both and he will never be forgotten!

Anonymous said...

Hang in there Katie! Reread your
1st or 2nd blogs when you told about Brenham's birth.

Katie said...

yeah, but there is so much more to his story than that. i want to remember EVERY detail and that is just a summary.

Sandy E said...

Yes, Katie is talking about the difference between being somewhere and reading about it. No matter how many details are included in the text, actually being there has infinitely more details to take in. It's this "there in real life" detail that Katie's talking about forgetting. And it's the essence of Brenham's actual presence (as opposed to his story) that we're talking about here.... :) So, yeah... it's a huge difference.

Anonymous said...

I love you Katie! I don't know what to say...


Nicole

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry Katie. Hang in there. We still think and pray for you often.

Anonymous said...

I'M PRAYING FOR YOU. Try and keep notes about what you remember and then put it on video. You can keep adding to it as you remember.

AHUMC said...

I can not wait to meet him and hear the rest of the story- the one we are not seeing right now-

love,
Debbi

Krista said...

I also know exactly how you feel and my story is so much more recent than yours. I have started writing down every detail from the minute everything happened- good, bad, happy and sad. I write about the facial expressions I remember and the smells and the sounds- it all comes back to me when I think of those things. Know that I feel your heartache and I am praying for you.